Before you waste precious moments of your life reading this review, I would like you to be aware that this review will turn into a rant. So if you’re still willing to spare a few minutes I shall continue. Riddick, oh Riddick you are totally and utterly riddick-ulous. I understand the franchise is a multimillion dollar machine but why are people still willing to spend their hard earned money on a film/films which lack everything.
Riddick is the third in the Chronicles of Riddick franchise, following on from Pitch Black and Chronicles. It follows the story of, wouldn’t you have guessed it Riddick and his need to get off a desert planet. He battles creatures, and people while taking a puppy under his wing. He finds a bounty hunter station and waits for them to come and collect the bounty on his head. Ok, so you would assume as a well versed film watcher that this element of the story would take up a quarter of the film, maybe. However this is the film in it’s entirety. That is it. There is very little story development, as apart from there being no story, nothing happens. Granted there is blood and violence but not enough to sustain a 120 minute film.
Vin Diesel is completely pointless as ever, and Katee Sackhoff gives one of the most cringeworthy performances I’ve seen in a mainstream film in several months. The supporting cast, however are fairly solid but for Karl Urban to be credited in the opening titles baffled me. Urban was in the previous Riddick films and was a substantial character with a lot of screen time. However he is in one scene which lasts about ten seconds and that is it. No more Urban and yet his name is in the opening credits. The CGI is shockingly bad, even scenes which should be fairly simple i.e. Diesel on a motorbike of sorts is so bad it looks like something off a Carry On film.
If you liked the previous films you’ll most probably like this one, however this franchise frustrates me greatly and I know this is more of a rant that review but there are few films which annoy me more. Finally, if you want a completely illogical, slow, boring film that does have a bit of violence go and enjoy it. Let it wash over you. But you know a film is bad when the best part is the puppy, and I hate animals.
P.S. Apologies for the rant.
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